Thank You

I just have to publically say thank you to Sariah, Lura and especially Julia for responding to my post about my inner turmoils and the pageant. I have written a note to last year's director to apologize for unintentional hurts, and that there were no intentional hurts. Interestingly, as soon as I got to church on Sun, I was informed by the Executive secretary that the bishop wanted to meet with me right after church. I gulped and told Nick I felt sick. He said, "You'll be fine." A few minutes later I went back to him ... "It's about the pageant, right?" "Right." "Now I feel really sick." "You'll be fine." A couple minutes and I was back, "Is it just me, or others?" He named two other names--including last years director. "I really feel sick." "You'll be fine."

Fortunately, it was time for church to start. I worried through Sac Mtg. I worried through SS. I worried through RS. I REALLY felt sick. As I waited in the foyer, carefully talking to someone else entirely, Nick came by and said, 'You'll be fine." I was beginning to believe him. Until I walked into the bishop's office with the others. Last years director started to launch right in as to take control of the meeting--Nick woudn't let her. Then the bishop wouldn't let her say a word. He said his piece. He mentioned a need for asking people with a little more tact--and she launched into two minutes of vitriol against me before anyone could take a breath. The other person sat in the corner looking like he was pretending not to be there! [and probably wished he weren't!] I sat stiff and straight. [And I didn't cry!} Bishop recovered quickly from his shock never having heard her attack me like that before [I had] and stopped her. Completely. He pointed out how great a thing the Psgeant was last year, but that he could and would quash it NOW if need be. She quieted down as he proceeded to outline the way things would work this year. I am director. She is essentially the artistic director. Any major changes must go through the executive producer. We don't even have to speak to each other. I left, feeling sick. I had told the bishop on many occasions thatI did not have to direct--I would bow out if needed. He says I am to direct, and after the meeting basically told me that he wanted me to do things my way. Whew. Later that afternoon, I rceived a phone call from her apologizing for jumping on me that way. I accepted her apology, but I feel just like last fall when she did basically the same thing to me for keeping things moving when she was out sick. So now I really know--how she feels, and that I am a friend only so far as she can use me. Oh well. The pageant is worth it on so many levels. This is my last public complaint. Now to go forward. With a smile :)