Perfectionism

Every month I go with a regular partner to visit four other ladies from church. This is called Visiting Teaching. we go with an assigned message, and we are to look after the welfare of the sister and her familial duties. Often the biggest thing is to take in meals for the sick, help with new babies or with various family emergencies etc. My partner, or companion and I were assigned together near the end of Jan. Somehow we mailed out the Jan message, but gave the Feb message, so when we went this week, we needed something. I picked up The New Era Magazine, which is our church mag for teens. It had a great article about perfectionism, I highly reccommend it. It is not a religious article per se, but a mental health article. If you don't have access to the mag. try lds.org I think you can find it there (Jan 2006 "What does it mean to be perfect?" If I knew how to do this kind of link I would. )

A few gems..."Men are that they might have joy, not guilt trips. (Russell M. Nelson) "Worthiness is a process, and perfection is an eternal trek. We can be worthy to enjoy privilages without being perfect."(Marvin J Ashton) "The Church is for the perfecting of the saints' it is not a well-provisioned rest home for the already perfected" (Neal A Maxwell)

The chart at the end is of special value. Perfectionism is defined as "a medical condition characterized by self-crticism and self-doubt, often accompanyied by anxiety, depression, or obsessive-compulsive behavior. It can lead to appetite and sleep disturbances, confusion, problems in relationships, inability to concentrate, procrastination of important tasks, and, if left untreated, major depression, anxiety disorders, and suicide."

Then comes the chart showing the difference between "doing your best" and "Perfectionism". I know all too many women for whom this topic is a grave cancern. I reccommend this article for what it is--a warning and an education onthis important topic. It happens to be addressed to an LDS audience, but it holds truth for anyone.

I've been thru episodes of perfectoionism, but my physical limitations have kept me safe due to the impossibility of my being perfect--quite a ludicrous thought! However, I've known personally several women who have suffered this so severely that it lead to bouts of time in mental hospitals, separation fron their familes for whom they wanted to be perfect, etc. In a couple cases they have been LDS, but I grew up with a family whose Mom was inand out of caree for this reason. Those kids essentially grew up without a Mom. Read the article--maybe you know someone with whom you need to share it. Maybe you need it, if not now than at some point in your life.

I am grateful for my limitations which do not allow me the chance of "being perfect". It is not a wrthwhile goal for me in this life...so I do not worry about it. We've seen it become a greater problem in our society, and it is an illness that affects females way more than males (tho. they can get it too) Anorexia, bulimea, cutting...all symptomatic of the same condition.

I'm stepping off the soapbox and heading to bed, now. Aren't you glad?